Dearest,
I looked up and there you were, eyes I recognize from long ago. A bright genuine smile calling me closer to you. Already unsteady on my feet at seeing you I have to keep myself from running. Each breath pounding in my head, each step loud in my ears, time taking an eternity to reach you and the touch of your hand.
The sound of your voice low and soothing, strong and sure, instantly sends me back to friends and laughter. Laughter over drinks, laughter on the beach, laughter in the air all around us, eyes twinkling with possibilities, young, fun and free.
Now there has been nothing but time and space between us, the love that was once vibrant and full of life sometimes feels like a faded memory. A life without each other has brought washed out color and music-less days. The faith in who we were together and what we could become has been taken by time and the lies we now tell ourselves.
As life seems to take us farther apart, our hearts become more firmly connected. The undeniable looming over us. What together was effortless, apart has become burdensome.
I have found strength with this burden. Fearing nothing because true love left behind is the biggest sorrow no matter how it shows up. But in true love is the ability to wonder, to hope, to believe and to dream.
Today I choose to dream. Today I dream of a pretty little house across from the pond, an Italian garden full of fresh vegetables , herbs and wild flowers. A home filled with hard won wisdom, love and laughter.
Today I will allow myself to hear the calling of your heart, a call that never ceases, a call that gets stronger and louder over time. Today I will allow myself to feel your presence, to feel your breath on my face. Today I will allow myself to embrace the maddening, unpredictable-ness that is you. Today I will allow myself to believe.
I looked up and there you were…
Forever